It was a terribly tiring day. All I did today was only studying and helping my friend in studying chemistry for its uas. I went late to campus today because I woke up very late. When I arrived, the meeting had been finished and all the students were doing the tasks given. So then I briefly went to chemistry building to Mr Suryo G.'s room. I was waiting for him in fact. Then, when he came, we had a little chat until he had to answer a few questions from his another student (the grammar is a bit wrong). After the meeting I studied PRE until now. I only changed places. I miss my best friend here.. He was in a distant place now, enjoying his days in his second hometown with his family. Wish you all the best, bhro...

I like this song..

This is the song strengthening me all the time...

Don't give up
It's just the weight of the world
When your heart's heavy
I will lift it for you

Don't give up
Because you want to be heard
If silence keeps you
I will break it for you

Everybody wants to be understood
Well I can hear you
Everybody wants to be loved
Don't give up
Because you are loved

Don't give up
It's just the hurt that you hide
When you're lost inside
I will be there to find you

Don't give up
Because you want to burn bright
If darkness blinds you
I will shine to guide you

Everybody wants to be understood
Well I can hear you
Everybody wants to be loved
Don't give up
Because you are loved

Mine or not??

It's been a year long I'm studying in this university. I've learned so much about relationship so far. The environment shaped me particularly that I'm terribly uneasy to believe in anybody even though it is my closest friends. I've tried hard to start thinking positively about anybody but the world seems to reject that kind of thought. So, this is me... a bit broken...

Sahabat???

Gmn reaksi lo kl sahabat lo tiba2 nyuruh lo cari sahabat laen ja, trs ngomong kl kita ga cocok dari awal, padahal dah tmenan ampir setaun dan stengah taun ptama have fun mlulu???? Apa smua yg dah dilewati, kebersamaanny, saling tolongnya, ga berarti apa??? Apa smua pengorbanan ga berarti apa2??? Apa slama ini smua sia2??? Ini sih pembunuhan massal.....

Forgotten

It's a bit contradicting, isn't it?? I forgot I wrote the "It's done" before this one. Anyway, it's true. It's been verified for more than a month long. But now, I've got used to. Eventhough nobody cares for me, (actually, I don't care of myself anymore too..) I won't let my exams score be down.

Now

It's been eight months since I first change my personality. Believe it or not, it was just like a rolling gear. The surrounding changes me back into I was before I entered the university. Everybody forced me to be alone. I have nobody to trust anymore. In fact, I've had nobody to confide in for such a long time till now. It is ridiculous, isn't it? Everybody around me forces me to look everybody as suspiciously as I can (I think the grammar is wrong... I don't know the correct sentence..). The ones I trust the most leave me one by one secretly. It is undeniable that this happens to me in exams period. I really couldn't concentrate to study. All I can do is just praying that He would take this cup from me... Hehe... (trying to escape)
Since I couldn't trust anybody, I couldn't tell what I'm undergoing now even to those I used to think they are the closest to me. The only think I've done since two days ago is not to eat any food (containing full ingredient for a formal or informal dine). I just drank mizone, water, and milk (milo of course). Yesterday I was forced to eat bread. So I ate it. But today I don't want to eat anything, just want to lament or just forgetting the past step by step 'cause every time I tried to remember those beautiful days I suddenly cried (too melancholic..). However, I have to face it all by myself since I have nobody to stand beside me anymore. Hikz.... Hikz....